well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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