Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
