question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Randomize
