doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
My Higher Power is John Stamos
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
