Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
