is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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