I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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