Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
