I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Randomize
