The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
