im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
