so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
