If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
