After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
