People in love make me want to vomit
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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