why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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