just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
