she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Its about making memories worth repressing
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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