Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Will exercising make me less horny?
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