so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
