Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
