I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
