THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
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