If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
