Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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