we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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