butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
