I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
