Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize
