maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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