is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
