yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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