Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
