making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
