So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
this will be a night to untag.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
