Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I need a beard to bite.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
