I skipped work to stalk him.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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