And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize