I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
