I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
