hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
