Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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