ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
