How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
