She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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