When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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