i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Apparently you make a good broom.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
