Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
