Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize