She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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