Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
